千金不換育兒生活指南

【英文寫作紀錄】千金A的海盜故事 The Ship Plot

千金A寫了一個故事,我覺得好可愛,怕以後忘記,放上來當個紀錄。

(原文)

Once upon a time, there was a pirate called Black Beard, his crew were Red Nose, Big Bull and Big Brate. Ship Heart and Gold Claw were there saying: the pirates are rich!

There was one problem. THEIR BRAINS WERE AS SMALL AS GERMS, so they were as dumb as walking peanuts. But the captain was a scholar, he was the only one who was smart but not very smart, his brain is as small as a speck of dust, which is still small. But they fought well, and they were well trained, even the most fearsome pirates called them KING! But being intelligent was not their good part.  

Once when they were eating fortune-cookies, the captains found a map that led to the pearls of mermaids in the dark sea. So, they stole the pearls and put the pearls into rings and wore the rings. It made them very evil clever. And meanwhile, the kingdom was in a rush! The king and the Queen were going to put the pirates in jail, so the pirates lived happily ever after in JAIL.

(媽媽有愛翻譯)

很久很久以前,有一個海盜叫做黑鬍子,他的船員包括紅鼻子、大牛跟布瑞特。他們的船心跟金爪都說明了:這些海盜很富有!

但他們有個問題,就是腦子跟蟲一樣小,所以他們跟會走路的花生一樣笨。這船長是一個學者,他是唯一聰明的,但也不是很聰明,他的腦子跟一粒灰塵差不多大,意思是也很小。但他們很會戰鬥,也受過良好的訓練,即便是最讓人害怕的海盜也稱呼他們為「王者」!但聰明不是他們的強項就是。

有一次,當他們在吃幸運餅乾的時候,海盜發現了一張地圖,這地圖帶領了海盜前往深海的人魚珍珠。他們偷了珍珠、把珍珠鑲在戒指上,並戴上那些戒指。這讓他變得聰明邪惡。在此同時,整個王國都很忙亂!國王跟王后要把海盜們關進監牢。於是海盜們從此幸福快樂地生活…在監牢裡。

陪伴孩子寫作,改作文的幅度要拿捏

這是千金A第一次寫出這種長度的故事,她寫得很樂,我看了也很驚喜。原文多處出現拼字跟文法錯誤,不過不影響意思表達,我在打成部落格文章的過程中有稍微修一下,不過就沒叫她更正了。

會決定這樣做,是因為之前跟一個在美國任教的朋友聊天時,聊到寫作興趣需要耐心長期培養,如果老師家長看小孩的作品時,一定要記得找出值得讚美的地方,如果只在需要修改的地方琢磨,小孩很快就會失去寫作動力。

同時,她也告訴了我一個她常用的技巧,就是「Two Glows and a Grow」,意思就是在一個作品中挑出兩點值得讚賞的地方拍拍手,同時指出一個可以進步的地方。另外,她說她在指派寫作作業的時候,會先想好這任務的練習目的是什麼,不在設計範圍內的錯誤,她會試情況不做修正,即便錯的是拼字也一樣。

跪著看!唱歌介紹故事寫作架構,3分鐘講完

最後分享一下我介紹兩千金故事寫作架構的方法,說穿了很簡單,就是放歌唱影片!我找到這個「Plot Mountain! | The Plot Diagram Song」,以歌唱的形式,在三分鐘把整個概要講得清清楚楚,重點是還很好看,有趣到千金B會反覆央求我讓她們再看一次。

製作這影片的Scratch Garden團隊很有才,他們家其他的影片也很值得看,推薦!

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